Peter Thiel and the Sirens of Craptopoly

Peter Thiel and the Sirens of Craptopoly 

I finished my shower using the new soap Mary had bought, possible from witches. I did not see the original packaging for this particular bar of soap, but am used to strange soaps—Kimchi, cantaloupe thyme and burnt lime a few-- clean but strange seemingly the house moto.

I’m comfortable saying that this soap was made of rutabaga and lye. My skin has peeled back from its underlying muscle and I now look like a cinnamon tree barking slab stick. I smell like late winter root vegetables.

On the TV, Peter Thiel is making sense, which surprises me. I think Peter is an alien, but he seems to be articulating exactly my feelings about this election. I turned off the TV, I’m tired of this election, I’m tired of white people talking in general -- I’m backwater Mike now, I’ve drifted out of the swift water into the unsensational eddy. Everything has always seemed stupid to me, but it seems that now that I have specific stupid to point to, I’m too tired and worn to pick up a baseball bat. Besides, we have sold all the bats to the Russians, who, I think, plan to float over here in surplus U.S. Navy boats and beat all our children to death with them (the bats) as if they were baby seals. Weighed, measured and found wanting, yet still alive in the bound stasis of the eddy, I ponder the point of all of it.

Which leads to Google, or maybe, life its self, or some strange combination of motivations and need --a good starting place for any exploitative religion, or heavy-handed sermon sounding truth.

Google may have a deep plan that expands daily based on knowledge inputs combined with some broad-based thinking by the smartest of the smart. This also may be how God works – really, who is to say? On the daytime level, however, Google exists to get us to view the ads it sells, as we view the ads (the abyss) Google also views us – i.e. information, that it uses to sell more (targeted) ads. The money from the ads is everything to Google – both the alpha and the omega – it’s the connection and the point end to everything Google does.

Every nice, sweet, wonderful thing or product that comes from Google is directed to the goal of increasing revenue. It’s all about the money; follow the money. When then sell you a cheap phone, it’s to look at their ads via their browser. When they give you unlimited storage of photos for free, it’s not to be nice – your information is the product, your eyes attention what they harvest to sell. Much like a cherry wraps its bad self in delicious crunch, Google gives it up to get you to use their goodness. Cherries want you to shit their seed in a different place --- Google maybe just wants you to read a special message from a paying sponsor. Shit will out, as the scientist say.

So, what is life about? What is the point of being alive? What’s the take away?

I don’t know the big stuff, the ‘what was before anything was’ kind of crap, but just as the google thing is about money, I think the life thing is all about making more life forever. It’s a numbers game, where the quantity creates the quality by accident –like a fox.

In the olden days of life, asexual reproduction was enough. One thing just split into two things. Then things wanted to get complicated, for reasons of differentiation and survival and adaptation, so it got sexual – instead of one thing making one more thing, life got two things combining to make a third totally new thing via mix-and-match parts.

So, it’s all about sex – like Google and the money, everything we see in and around us is about making babies that last long enough to have more babies. This is the functional point to life. Why I don’t know, maybe it’s important. I personally think it’s described in the history book, ‘Sirens of Titan’, by Kurt Vonnegut. I think we are all cogs in a vast parts delivery system. (More likely, and Peter Thiel agrees with me on this one – we are all living in hologram, or as I’ve put it in the past – we are meat DVD’s. So, to recap -- Peter Theil is an alien IN a hologram -- our collective hologram).

I think sometimes we assign our motivations fancy pants titles when the answer is lusty sex. In fact, if we just say ‘for the children’ to every request asking for reasons or the why, I think we would save time and allow for more science time to find out the big unanswered questions, for instance – why does Khloe look so much like O.J. Simpson?

 Just as Google’s new Pixel phone gives us an unbelievable virtual reality experience for a low, low price, it’s important to remember that Google made it to get us to watch their ads on the Internet and make money. Much like men go to the gym and grow facial hair to get laid.